Tag Archives: Support

Constantly Re-Imagine

I have it on good authority that I can be a bit anxious. It’s not just the constant fidgeting and obsessive planning, either. Apparently my imagination can get away with me and I have a tendency to worry about hypothetical bad situations.

While I certainly think that a healthy level of concern and contingency planning is a good thing (I can thank spending time with engineers for that), maybe every thought about the future doesn’t have to be the absolute worst case scenario. It is nice being pleasantly surprised all the time, however, when things work out far better than I had imagined!

In all seriousness, though, taking some time to re-imagine yourself and your business as a “best case scenario” has been a healthy exercise for me. So long as the time is taken to construct an action plan detailing how you / the business will reach these goals.

When doing this, it is important to start at the top, so to speak. Don’t start with where you are now and determine the path you can take and see where you will end up. Instead, begin with the end and then construct the path. This way you are not held back by your current situation.

That being said, it is important to be grounded in reality. Sorry to say it, but all our parents lied to us. We can’t be anything we want to be, and that’s ok. Who wants all those choices, anyway? I sure don’t.

So take some time on a regular basis to re-imagine yourself or your business. If you don’t, then what are you working for?

External Support

After a very relaxing a positive long weekend, I’m hoping that I have found some new perspectives and can hang on to them long enough to 1) see if they have a difference in my life and 2) blog about them. Now that I’m grounded back in reality, and the gears have started running at near full speed, it’s time to (over)analyse what is currently rattling around in my mind.

What has stuck with me the most is the double-edged sword of support. I would dare to guess that support is overwhelmingly thought of as a positive thing. While it definitely can be (more about that later) the idea that support is actually a negative thing is an interesting concept.

To use me as the example, I have definitely had more than my share of support over the years. From parents and family, to teachers and colleagues, to friends, the list goes on. While I am extremely grateful for the backing, I wonder if there was ever a time when it wasn’t what I needed. If it would have been better to hear some hard truths, rather than the positivity that flowed toward me. Maybe mistakes or failures could have been avoided.

I’m not saying any of this to try and shrug off the role I play in each one of my failures (99.9% fault), but it’s interesting to think about. I have at least five examples off the top of my head where I was supportive of a friend, and held back the reservations I had about the idea, only to see it not work out for them. Would it have been better to be more blunt?

This idea that we can do anything we set our minds to that may have us have been raised with doesn’t seem to be very realistic. Or if it is, maybe probability should have entered into the conversation. I can just imaging sitting little Timmy down and saying, “You can do anything you set your mind to, but as you are already 6 foot 9, it is not very likely you’ll be the best jockey the world has ever seen.”

There is a delicate balance between building confidence and staying grounded in reality. As someone who can dream up some pretty wacky ideas, I need to be constantly reminding myself of that. Especially when there are people around you giving you encouragement.

To the positive side of things, support is awesome! Almost like a drug. When someone is in your corner it’s validation, praise and love all rolled into one. I truly can’t comprehend the mind of someone who says they don’t want support. I would guess that more often than not, that means they can’t find anyone who wants to agree with them and goes down the path anyway.

For people who need validation (me) support can be both an asset and liability. I don’t expect that people will change how they react to others’ ideas overnight, but I’m going to do my best to determine if they are being encouraging because they agree with the idea, or if it’s the “right” thing to do. Hopefully that can greatly reduce the number of mistakes I make.